Vitamin Coat

They bought it, they said, because they wanted to.

I know this was the truth. They couldn't help themselves. My mother, herself once a young girl attending the same boarding school where I now resided, had endured the bitterly cold winters there without the added warmth of a good pair of pantyhose: Her family just couldn't afford them. And of course she'd never enjoyed the luxury of what she and my father were now proposing to buy - a long, wool winter coat.

I eyed the circular racks of potential selections with suspicion. I knew what a purchase like this would cost them. Especially at the nicest store in the mall. And I also knew that simply sending my brother and I to this school had put them in a financial pinch as it was. And yet still - here we were. My mom's face was determined. My dad was her stoic supporter.

And so we searched, my family and I - my brother trying not to yawn too obviously at the tedium (for him) that ensued. I tried on. I turned. I held out my arms and buttoned myself in. And with each coat, the conviction became more sure. I would walk out of this store the proud owner of a ridiculously expensive insurance policy against catching a chill while at school. They'd already bought me a ski jacket for the winter, and I'd been careful to select one in a neutral color that would function well as a dress jacket, too. But here we were - selecting a long one in a classy navy hue, trying on soft cashmere scarves to go with it, boxing up the whole throat-tightening expense, and walking from the store as though we made purchases like this every day.

My friends, I knew, would probably think nothing of this sort of thing. They'd been sporting coats like this since the beginning of my stint here at school. But for me - having only recently seen my own mother accept a similar gift from her parents (she certainly couldn't affort to buy herself such a treat) - for me, the gift was unspeakable.

I wore the coat, that winter. I wore it often. In my subconscious, I prayed for snow even, to justify the purchase my folks had made. Willing it to be cold, I wrapped myself up in that coat the way I folded myself into their love whenever I came home on long weekends. And as the winters wore on, and I drove off to college with my brother ... and as I moved across country, and got maried, and had children, and settled in a climate where nobody needs a long coat like that ... their love, and their gift, stayed right with me.

Sometimes I'd see that navy coat hanging in my closet, and I'd wonder: Should I sell it in my next garage sale? After all, I wouldn't be needing it ever again. And besides, it had grown to look rather dated.

But each time I reached to remove it from its hanger, I just couldn't make myself do it. The coat had grown to become a symbol for far more than just extra warmth in the winter. It reminded me, uncannily, of all that my parents gave up to offer me the education, the opportunities, the joy and the freedom that were mine through the years. I could no more sell it in a garage sale than I could hawk the beauty of my childhood.

And so, to this day, the long coat remains. I'm moving back, now. Back to the cold college town where the coat got its most use. Will I wear it again there? Even though it's ten-plus years past its prime? Probably. And if I do, I'll wear it with pride. Because gifts of love, just like this one, always bring joy to my life.

Vitamin J

Why on earth did such a simple gift affect me so profoundly? It was just a pack of socks, after all. Brown, stripey socks, to be exact. And beige socks with brown toes. And brown socks with polka-dots all over. All told, there were five silky-thin pairs in the bunch - ankle socks, waiting to be washed, folded, and worn with nearly every outfit in my closet.

My friend looked at my joyfully. "I knew you'd love them!" she said. "I remembered talking about socks with you the last time we were in the store - so when I had to pick up some socks for myself, I just couldn't help it! You had to have some, too!"

I couldn't wipe the silly grin off of my face. "Well, you were right!" I hugged her, and hugged her again, and stared at my socks in delight. "They're just ... perfect!" How my classy, sassy, big-hearted friend had known just what would tickle my soul I wasn't sure. But she had hit the nail smack dab on the head with this gift. I fingered those socks, thinking of how I would never have purchased such a luxury for myself until the very last minute. I buy socks one pair at a time, and in practical colors like white and ... well ... white. But these - these were not only functional in their ability to match most of my meager outfits - they had a touch of attitude, too! I felt spoiled beyond all reason, and as I lovingly folded those socks, I realized that this treasured feeling was the hallmark of my relationship with J.

We met so long ago that we've now known each other just as long as we haven't ... and we're still growing closer with time. We've had three chilren each since those early days ... and as I sit across from my friend now, I see the lines of laughter and motherhood on her beautiful face. She has grown more dear to me with time, and has taught me lessons that sink deeper than she can possibly imagine. Lessons like:

Pamper yourself on occasion - and pamper your kids more, as well.
Respect your husband for just who he is. Love him extravagently, as you want to be loved.

Rejoice - laugh - be silly - and enjoy staring at spiders with young boys. You only live once after all!

Take pleasure in experiencing the small things.

She insists on lauding me as the one from whom she can learn, but here I think she's mistaken. I am a hard person - hard on myself, hard on my chidren, and given to assuming that all of life must be hard. She, on the other hand, deals in softness. She works with her children witha gentle hand. She wears her heart on her sleeve. And each time I'm with her, I pray a bit of that softness rubs off. I am enriched by her very presence ... and I don't tell her that often enough.

The truth is really quite simple: Each time my friend waltzes through my front door, she brings with her a few rays of sunshine, a practical, soul-warming something that, much like those socks, cheers me to a ridiculous degree. She's just moved to my town, and were it not for the fact that I myself am preparing to move, we'd have many moments ahead in which to share the joy of each other's presence. I'm sad to journey away from her again, but I know that, not long from now, she'll be waltzing through my door again. And when she does, I know, too, that she'll be bearing the gift of her love in both arms - and I, with undeserving gratitude, will accept it.

There's nothing like an old friend. I hope I keep her forerver.

Vitamin Delight

This morning, to my absolute joy, autumn hung in the air. Suspended, it invaded each pore of my skin as my children and I galloped along on our walk.

Oh, the joy of it! Crisp, lovely air! Although autumn brings with it the promise of long, dark, cold days, in the very moment of its presence, it also provides something so sweet - the knowledge that I can now exert myself as much as I want without overheating in the warm air.

And so I tromped through that glorious understanding today, up one hill and down another, reveling in the last dance of summer before a new season took over completely. One more performance, before the curtain call. The flowers still bloom, the leaves haven't all faded - and yet that 'brisk' in the air tells it all. Autumn is coming! Autumn is here! For a brief several days, the two seasons will share the stage before summer subsides completely, and I love it - it delights me!

This bountiful feeling rang in my heart as I sat down to study later in the morning. And I came across several sentences which, when tied together, speak for the kind of joy I cling to most of all.

"At God's right hand are pleasures forevermore," says the Bible, reminding me of the incessant joy I can expect upon reaching heaven. But then, in an odd quirk, I read another verse about God's right hand. "Jesus Christ is seated at the right hand of the Father."

Do you see how those two verses play off each other? Perhaps I can begin to experience that "incessant joy" way down here, on faded old earth. If pleasures forervermore are really at God's right hand, well, look at that - those pleasures must be found in Jesus, because He's already there! And lo and behold, I've already found Jesus - so therefore, let the delighting begin!!

It's a beautiful thing to stumble across a connection like this, because it makes the rest of my day sort of glisten. I've been going about my day sort of smiling on the inside. It's as though I get to taste two worlds at once today, and not just two seasons. Sure, I look forward to eternal delight in heaven, but now I see it - here on earth, even as the act's about to close, I can savor the beginnings of that delight in the person and presence of Jesus. It's so beautiful, so generous ... so delightful! And now all that remains remains is to dive in, experience Him for all that He's worth, and say thanks to the One who created me to long for Him in the first place. Nothing, no one, can please me more - and so I dive in, grateful for whatever delights He brings my way through His presence. Thank You, God, for this day. I love You.

Amen.

BONUS! Two other quotes on pleasure that seem to go well together.

"There is no pleasure comparable to not being captivated by any external thing whatever." (Thomas Wilson, 1663-1735).

Delight yourself in the Lord, and He will give you the desires of your heart. (Psalm 37:4)

Vitamin Candle

I just walked by my kitchen table and smelled the most wonderful, soothing aroma. The kitchen is dark - the sounds of the night winding down linger about me. The washer clicks and hums ... a movie's just ending on the TV. I've been puttering around online and in my bedroom for the past hour, enjoying the silence. But this candle - this single green candle - the thing that's putting off such a beautiful smell - reminded me at once of the sounds and experiences of this past weekend.

My friend Melanie brought over the candle the other evening, unceremoniously, before we all sat down to dinner. We enjoyed a great time then. I set the candle on another table and left it there. Then, this weekend, it just seemed right to light it up.

We had a crowd in our home - at least for us. Between three and six extra kids, and four extra adults - all of our dearest friends. The husbands went out for twenty-four hours of backpacking and guy time, and we ladies stayed in with the kids and enjoyed ice cream, a late night, and lots of laughter. We let the candle burn then, and it's still burning now - a small, simple reminder of the fellowship and peace we enjoyed with our friends. Yes, they've almost all gone home now. Yes, we've moved on to complete the rest of our evening. But like the candle - the gift of their friendship remains ... enriching our lives even when we aren't consciously aware of it.

I couldn't ask for more from my friends - more from God. He has blessed our family with true, loyal, forgiving, life-honoring people with which to share this journey. I only hope that we can spread some sort of richness to their lives as well. For our part, we've been blesssed beyond measure ... and we are eternally grateful.